ah, the irony of it all (to mimic cin's title)

is it irony when something that is meant to accomplish some purpose actually does the opposite? i never remember the exact definition of irony, and the alanis morissette song doesn't help any, since none of the examples in it are actually ironic, as far as i remember. heh. oh, well. i'm sure one of you brilliant people on friends list can help enlighten me.

sorry in advance for the rambling i think i will do in this entry. i'm in a kinda odd mood, so it's gonna come out here. i guess it could be worse...i could be in a bad mood, and i'm not. i'm in a thoughtful mood, for sure...looking back on this year and college in general. it's a little bizzare, to think that i'm almost done. i go back and forth between being happy about it and being kinda sad. yesterday, i danced with comp for the last time. that was definitely sad, and i kept thinking how i don't wanna leave. today, i'm excited about the possibilities of something new. goodness, it'll be great to do my own thing.

i'm listening to the beatles, which is usually my fool-proof method of feeling more normal, and it's not working so well. i guess it's 'cause usually, they work when i'm sad, and i'm not actually sad. who am i trying to convince of this, right? but i think sad would imply disappointment, like there was an expectation that wasn't met, and that isn't the case at all. it's more like, ok, confirmed, moving on. so i think where i am now, in all sorts of ways, is a transitional state. i've been here for a while now, what with getting ready to graduate and all, but it's only today finally hit me full force, the amount of adjusting i'm gonna have to do. funny how things can trigger very unrelated realizations.

actually, as i'm listening to the beatles longer, i'm definitely feeling more cheerful. it's working! yay! it's working! ok, sorry, got a little hyper. so, taking a deep breath to dispel the heavy feeling in my chest and moving on to do other things, such as homework. yes.