deja vu

[dancingyel]

had a crummy day, as evidenced by journal entries. was happy when friend called. told him my issues re: needing people too much and feeling like only my family would be affected greatly if i went to live in antarctica or something. ammended that to my family and my roomie. he said something to the effect of, "well, who would be affected if i went to antarctica?" i said that i would and he replied, "well, only you and my family then" and proceeded to try and convince me that God can replace people. and all i could think of was, "oh, i guess you wouldn't care if i went to antarctica, then...no, that's right, you have God...people must not matter." i know that's probably unfair...wait, no, i know it's unfair, but at this point, i don't really care. i mean, seriously, shouldn't one be at least a little sensitive? or is that too much to ask?

as for God, it is my firm belief that He put people here to do things He's choosing not to do...such as hug their friends and such...and that He can't really replace people in the sense that He chooses not to take on human form and go to each sad person and hug him or her. i mean, He sends His love through people, so when someone hugs you it's like God hugging you...but yes. i don't know if that all makes sense written down, but it makes sense in my head.

off to bed i go...i hope tomorrow is a better day.

Comments

[slamjoe.livejournal.com]

Elaine, I love your honesty and the way you express how you feel. Often people will hang on to what they feel is "absolute truth" at the expense of tenderness. I say you need both. But everyone comes short of exuding both kindness and truth at some instance in their lives.

if you moved to Antartica, make sure you send me a post-card! j/k... I'd miss you too.

i'm not sure if antartica carries post cards...

[dancingyel.livejournal.com]

thanks, sam...i woke up and checked my lj, and seeing your comment totally made me smile. that's a good thing...started today off on the right foot.

my goodness! don't you think nikki would miss you too?

[waccoonie71.livejournal.com]

and why antarctica? it's terribly cold there and you hate cold.

but yes, that sentiment makes sense and is completely in line with my own...if i'd been in your room (or rather, if we were in ucsd, since it might be rather disturbing if i appeared suddenly), then i could've hugged you...but as it happens i was not...an e-hug now will have to suffice. *huggles* you know i'd miss you. i hope today is better...acutally it should be, cuz i need to bring something over to your house today if you're there. so call me up when you are.

thanks for the custard tarts! they are very yummy!

[dancingyel.livejournal.com]

yes, i think it would be a little disturbing if you *poof* and appeared in my room...and today was definitely a better day. we got yummy chinese food and went over to my sister's and i got to play with rachel, who's an absolute doll. it was tres nice!

oh one more thing before i forget

[waccoonie71.livejournal.com]

since i like the box so much better...^___~

mel says she has tix to the preview screening of "four feathers"...you know, that new film coming out with heath ledger that looks stupid but we want to see it only cuz heath ledger is in it...hehehehe. but yes, it's on sept 17 at 7:30 at AMC 1000, so let me know so i can let her know if you want to go.

oh, darn

[dancingyel.livejournal.com]

i wish i could go, but that's the day of my last class at massage...and the class is a 6:30 one, so i won't be done in time for it. sorry...